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Hey Marvin!
This is Connell the Barbarian coming to you from Santa Cruz, California! I often visit your site and finally decided to squeeze out an email to you. One of the hottest sites on the Net, my man!
So I’ve had a crazy life, done lots of shit, been around the block a few times. In one of those stupider times of my life, I was a Sergeant in the United States Army.
Anyways, I had a real knack for polishing my boots – giving my jump boots that make-my-drill-sergeant-come-all-over-them spitshine. Like you were looking into two small mirrors. I’m not what you’d call a “boot worshipper” but I do love keeping a super-sharp polish on my boots to show my pride in myself. I can often spend hours polishing my boots, sorta getting into a trance with it. It’s very calming and very sexy at the same time. I kinda keep half a chub while I’m polishing them, buts there’s something deeper to it than that as well.
I want to share with you and your readers the way that I make my boots so fuckin’ sexy!!! And it’s a lengthy, time-consuming process but oh so worth it when you’re done!
My boots are standard Army issue “Jump Boots”, with the double-leather toe and heal. Size thirteens. (In the US, thoze-r-sum damn big foots!) Hey, I’m 6′5, 225 lbs. They go with the rest of my Viking stature…
So the first thing you need to do is get the paint off your boots. You really need to start the polishing processing with just the leather. Now you don’t have to be anal but the more evenly you can get the paint off, the better. And the way to do that is with a scrubbing pad and saddle (leather) soap. In the US we have “scotch brite” pads that are green plastic scrubber pads for washing dishes. Mildly abrasive. Get the pad wet, dip it in the saddle soap and start srubbing your boots. You don’t have to do the whole boot either. With the jump boots, you can easily just concentrate on the toe and heel. If your boots are Docs or Rangers or whatever, just use your own good judgment. Did I mention that this takes awhile? Be patient, be thorough and even. Rinse carefully and sparingly as you go. You don’t want to soak your boots through. Try not to let water get inside.
Then let the boots dry overnight.
In the morning take your standard black shoe polish (Kiwi brand here in the States) set it on fire. BE CAREFUL. Just for a few seconds, to let the top layer of polish to melt, and then heavily coat your boots with the hot goo. Wait a few minutes for the goo to dry a bit and then brush one boot (with a camel or horse hair brush and then a buffing rag) to a nice brilliance, then immediately swab it down with polish again, and set it aside to dry. Brush the second boot (while the first dries) then put more polish on it and set it aside.
Repeat this three more times, each time using a heavy coat of polish. BE CAREFUL WITH THE FLAME. Don’t burn yourself or your flat down! After fourth brushing, let the boots dry at least another eight hours.
Now come the tedious but trancey part…
Take an all clean, cotton t-shirt and slightly dampen one bit of it with COLD water. Stick your index and middle fingers into the damp area and then rub a SMALL bit of (unflamed) polish onto the damp cloth and then start rubbing the polish onto one boot in small circles, over and over. Small little circles. If you’re doing it right, at the beginning, the polish kinda streaks light finger painting. But then it starts to glisten and smooth out. Do these circles over and over, more and more lightly, until the streaking stops and a nice sheen appears. Set the boot aside. And do this to the other. Small circles. A dab of polish on the finger tips and polish a small area with small circles. Small circles. Did I mention this will take awhile?? Little Cirlces. Over and over. What you’re doing is laying a micro-fine layer of polish over the leather, smoothing out the bumps (what were cow pores) with the water, the polish, the pressure.
Then go back and do it again to both boots. And then again. A total of EIGHT times. That’s right, eight micro-fine layers of polish lovingly laid onto the leather. At least. The more you polish them this way, the shinier and smoother the finish will become.
You should now have a super-sharp shine on your boots that will be the envy of all your mates! Just takes some elbow-grease, patience, and a lot of time. Yes they scuff easily so be careful! But if you’ve done it right, the shine is quite easy to maintain. Just lay down another micro-layer every other day, run a brush over them daily, maybe the buffing rag. They’ll stay like mirrors! Deeper scratches just scrub down with a pad and a little saddle soap and start over again in just that one little area. Super easy….
Happy Polishing!
And I’d love to hear feedback (or questions) from any who try this. If you email me, I’ll send you a pic of me and my sharp boots! : )
Connell the Barbarian…aaarrrrhhhh
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